Draw/Write My Life

Well this might as well be entertaining for the ‘stalkers’ finding on some ‘gossip‘ to fill in their time. I hope this becomes somewhat entertaining perhaps or maybe an eye opener.

I want to say first off…I hate talking about myself. To me talking about myself seems so narcissistic and perhaps a bit self-centred in the sense of being high & mighty. Now since that’s off my chest…& I apologise way in advance it is a very lengthy read…
My father came to Australia with his first wife Elizabeth & my older half-sister & well a few years after that my older half-brother was born. They lived in Newie & well drew apart when they got older. My father then re-married to Matilda & then well this part of the family tree branch I really don’t know about as this remains a total mystery to me. They too drew apart.

So where does Ninja fit in all of this? She fits in the 3rd generation tree branch my father being the roots of the tree here in Australia.

Dad flew to the Philippines because a ‘friend’ was playing matchmaker at the time. Mum was working in Manilla & well; being the traditional family types they were. Dad had to woo Mum to invite her to Australia & start a family & all that good stuff. I have to admit mum was an impressive legal secretary in her prime. After sometime Mum & Dad came to Australia; lived in Newie, then in 1985 I was born. A few years later my brother was born.

So where does the ninja beginfor this novel of a biography?

To be honest, ninja didn’t really have much of a perfect start. She was under-weight & prematurely born. I know totally the opposite of what she is now right, wouldn’t pick that up yeah! She ended up being in hospital for a few days before her mum could take her home. There was an incident that sort of defines me, not a real great memory of mine (I was able to block this out when I was very young but it came out in High school & well traumatised me) the incident happened at the age of 5 years. I rather leave it at that cause talking about this doesn’t help me anymore; it just degrades me & makes me bitter like a lemon just at the thought of it. It’s the explanation to how I look & well might explain a lot of other things that might seem ‘weird’ about me in general.

Primary schooling, Ninja had a speech impedimentdue to her being prematurely born and some other factors certain words were not able to be spoken properly or even be heard clearly. If you hear me say some specific words, you might pick up on it. I won’t reveal what those words could be & no it aren’t swearing words. I went to Garden Suburb (Kindy-Year2) so the speech pathologist could help with my speech closely (SLP class group). Special mention goes to Mrs Blanch for believing I can do anything when I had no faith in myself & showing what real kindness from others are like. There was this one time when I decided to go to the soccer field to play soccer with the other kids. (I always played soccer with my little brother or tennis ball rollies to each other) Anyway, I wanted to join in so I chased the ball trying to tackle & try to score a goal with the soccer ball. The boys ganged up on me & well let’s say one soccer ball just didn’t appear on the field & the target wasn’t the goal area. What I remember also that I spent most of the time, especially during breaks honestly crying alone on the grassy hill because I couldn’t relate to anyone in my peer group & was picked on by the older kids from time to time. I met my first ever friend June here, played tennis there a lot & unfortunately she had to move away. I was such a smartass it wasn’t funny & a good little angel too during class time. Then the Ninja went to Iso Public School, Year3 till 6. My friend Pat was School Captain then she moved, & I became the School Captain (was the vice) & April became the Vice. I remember fragments of school there; my favourite spot was the library because I felt a connection with storytelling & art. I was mostly academic focussed thanks to growing up with strict parentals, didn’t really have much of a childhood so to speak socialising with other people outside of school. Special mention to Mr Hughes, Mrs Lachglan & Miss Kennedy, each of these teachers taught me somethingHughes the value of research & study when endearing with effort, Kennedy the value of passion in everything one does & Lachglan the value of kindness with the pleasure of self-discovery through the wonder of wisdom & knowledge. Only with people my father approved. I went to the Junction Public school briefly in Year 6, Mum tried to leave my father due to abuseit didn’t last as cunning as my father was, she went back to him after 2 months. I don’t have really good memories much a few people were kind to me but it was an act so they could gossip & have ammo to tease with. One boy, OMGBrenton was his name, he kept on teasing me so much that I chased him all over the school during the class breaks every day for a month. I almost swung a baseball bat at him once out of total frustration, luckily a teacher saw what was happening & made him stop.

Despite all of thatthere was Newcastle Show, Sydney, Country visits to dad’s friendsplenty of food (boxes upon boxes of fresh fruit) Since Father was working at BHP & was constantly given ‘milk tickets’ he would come home with battered fish or the ever family favourite Apple Turnovers. I had made few friends in Primary School & my brother was always the sport freak, I was too playing cricket with the boys. In year 6 at Junction Public I represented the school for Shot put! LOL. Loved Art & reading fiction books. Growing up with a close family friend, we call pretty much call each other family even though no blood relation. Smile for the camera! They were fleeting memories that were sometimes the grasping hopes for the reality for what is better in life. My father was a great provider for survival or somewhat materialistic things, sometimes it’s not the materialistic things that provide warmth or

High School, Worst Haircut Ever! No jokes first High school picdevastated! So the silver picture that has me in it. On the left that’s what I called the ‘Fabled rice ball haircut of the century’. The right side is pretty much in Year 11. Mighty morphing power ranger LOL I don’t know what to say. I was a sport freakVolleyball, Basketball, Archery, Shot put, Long jump & Javelin. Swimming was never my forte & never felt comfortable in a swimming cossie. Martial Arts also had taken its ninja step into my life as the discipline encouraged me & gave me strength throughout my hardships; it was the only thing my father allowed me to participate in outside of schooling. A special mention goes to Mr Anderson for teaching me to follow my spirit & showing me faith in people again. Art still in eyes blinking away Mrs Wondergem (I loved this last name, always admired it) helped me refine my skills as an artist & to value my perspectives, thank you. Ninja was not free from chains so to speak, she tried to break free by sport or extra curricula activities but nope that minor trick to socialise didn’t work. School still remained the only venue to socialise. During this time, my father suffered dementia & was being hospitalised a lot & was having organ dysfunctionparticularly his liver (scerious[spelling?]) which in time became the domino effect for everything that followed after that. I the lone wolf out of school belonged to a group, we were outcasts because well I don’t know why but social status/standards in schools always confused me as I never understood why it mattered. There were about 10 of us in the group always chatting away or playing handball. I was the crazy one who developed the DBz move; it always got me in trouble as they thought I double handed play the ball LOL. These were the good memories I kept, there was a few bullying issues but I don’t want to talk about those either.

The people that I have or had as friends, thank you for showing me what friendship is like; at times when I struggled through my own hardships & battles you were there to lift up my spirit on times when I could not. To be honest, I would’ve lost it at times that were considered critical mentally; you guys were my hope…thank you! You all know who you are! In my past & present for sure.

When Ninja turned 21oh man did the devil in me escape! OMG seriously, I was so evilin a way. The best way to describe this was; everything I didn’t do I so totally did with no remorse. I lost the v card stupidly at a party totally smashed, out of loneliness & wanted to see what the whole ‘fuss’ was about. I wonder what that army recruit is doing now, “Hey StephenI wonder what you’re doing now?” From that time on, I had no real plansalways thought go with the flow on life & don’t take it harshlyalready went through hell & there’s no way it could get any worse. I was partying most of my time & looking for work that didn’t involve in fast food places. I ended up helping my mum doing housekeeping from time to time. After this period Ninja studied a lot Childcare, Multimedia, Security, and then finally Hospitality. I had a romance, lasted 3 years during this time as well. She was on XBL gamer spotlight for Dec 2012 on the American servers she also played Halo team death match on Presstart. Constantly she tries to encourage local gamers to play at DFP (Downforwardpunch.com.au) the local gaming tournament in Newcastle.

So what am I doing now, she’s working at a Hotel. She’s the Ninja in the group, wants to have a restaurant with her little bro at some stage currently pending on that due to financial factors. She has kept most of her friends from her past & made a fair few new ones. Majority got in contact with most of them through Facebook (not surprised there right!!!) I haven’t changed, much perhaps but the same spirit that was the positive one is a bit disappearing out of me; a string pulls at a time. Despite of that, strived & hard work to the full ability that I have regardless what anyone throws at me or life or medical issues or whatever it can be! At this current time I am content, just wishing I had more funds for the internet really so I can chillax a lot more better than ‘offline’ gaming & re-connect with people; also for the restaurant dream. Life can be good if you can turn it around, it’s a choice or perhaps the effort to try to make it better is the ever flowing way to better oneself. The never ending tongue twister with the ninja’s babble of a message right! LOL!

So my message, what is it?

No matter how terrible life maybe, remain hopeful as you never know what’s around the corner for oneself!

❤ Blazikenblade xxooxx



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